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Friday, December 7, 2012

Dealing with Difficult Relatives

I have been fortunate that, in my extended family, there are no “problem people” to make the holidays difficult. However, there was a couple in my distant past with whom I couldn’t spend a weekend without getting a sick headache that was followed by “tossing my cookies.” Fortunately, I don’t have to deal with that kind of stress anymore, but I can sympathize with those who still do. That’s why I want to share this blog post I found: 8 tips for dealing with difficult relatives during the holiday season.

My coping advice is to smile, nod, and say nothing when someone brings up a controversial topic. My nodding has less to do with agreeing than the fact that yes, I hear where you are coming from.

How do you handle difficult people during the holidays?

6 comments:

  1. Thank goodness, I don't think I've ever had really difficult people in my family or extended family of friends. Guess I'm blessed! Even my ex-husband's family were lovely people who were always happy to see me, years after the divorce. There are people I care about more than others, but none made me consider staying away - none made me sick.

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  2. I loved my dad and my grandma dearly, but they both were difficult. We would not have survived the many unpleasant, headache and cookie-tossing inducing clashes at holidays and other family gatherings but for the fact that we loved one another dearly. Love fueld by lots of prayers is how we coped.

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  3. Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). Unfortunately in my past situation, I was resented rather than loved. I was also too inexperienced at the time to know how to deal with that stress.

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    1. Even in the presence of praying people who truly did love one another, the stress at those holiday gatherings was just incredible. Wish I'd had access to Gretchen's 8 tips for dealing with difficult relatives back then! Thanks for this resource.

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  4. I generally smile and not a lot, too. Then when I've had all I can stand, I shoot my husband the, "Get me out of here - NOW!" look or hint by telling my kids to clean up their messes....then run like the wind!

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  5. A little more advice -- When you are tempted to argue about something, ask yourself:

    1) Can I possibly change their minds?
    2) Will I feel better afterwards for having said my part?

    If the answer to both those questions is no, then keep the peace and say nothing.

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